December 2010
169 posts
jack and jill went up the hill to smoke some...
Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road ?
Plato: For the greater good.
Aristotle: To fulfill its nature on the other side.
Karl Marx: It was a historical inevitability.
Albert Einstein: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.
Buddha: If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken-nature.
Darwin: It was the logical next step after coming down from the trees.
Saddam Hussein: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.
Mark Twain: The news of its crossing has been greatly exaggerated.
Mishima: For the beauty of it. The chicken's extension of its sinuous legs sent shivers of a dark despair into the souls not only of the silently watching hens but also the roosters, who felt a sudden sexual desire for their exquisite comrade. The dark courage of the chicken was as beautiful as drops of dew upon jade at midnight, struck by a partial moon, its light filtered through clouds. One of the deeply aroused roosters could stand the intensity of the moment no more and bit off the head of the beautiful, courageous chicken-hero, whose wine blood was deliciously drunken by the road, and he died.
Camus: The chicken's mother had just died. But this did not really upset him, as any number of witnesses can attest. In fact, he crossed just because the sun got in his eyes.
Martin Luther King: I have a dream that one day chickens can cross the damn road without their motives being questioned.
That awkward moment when you realize Ke$ha looks...
fukenanthony:
When boys use long words and spell correctly.
iwantyourtesticles:
Alam na!
Vina: Natatakot ako mag-prito. Tumatalsik kasi yung oil.
Vince: Gumamit ka kasi ng thongs. Wait - thongs ba or tongs?
Vina: TONGS HAHAHAHAHAHA
Vince: Ay iba pala yung thong.
There are two types of greetings:
fatregina:
Friends:
Best friends: